You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize