Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
