YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
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Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
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This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
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