dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Someone shit on the floor
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
