So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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