I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
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You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
NoShamevember. You game?
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I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I am available for nakedness
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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