wakey wakey hands off snakey
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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