Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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