you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
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