maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
