i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Michael Bay diarrhea
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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