): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
