mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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