I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize