Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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