I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
