are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
