So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
