Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
