I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
