btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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