If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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