I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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