oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
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Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
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Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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