it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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