Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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