Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
