he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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