Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
