There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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