Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
