I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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