I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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