We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
