I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
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we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
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Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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