Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
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