no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
