I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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