I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
that is very illegal...i love you.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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