When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
