Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light

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  (704): Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light http://tfl.nu/mxes
  Replies (8) Good night (1619) Bad night (356) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.

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  (530): I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame. http://tfl.nu/96nu
  Replies (45) Good night (575) Bad night (2398) Order T-Shirt
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss

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  (616): who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss http://tfl.nu/d23g
  Replies (43) Good night (9262) Bad night (534) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.

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  (218): Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace. http://tfl.nu/81g3
  Replies (47) Good night (808) Bad night (4792) Order T-Shirt
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.

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  (832): Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool. http://tfl.nu/d5dr
  Replies (48) Good night (10731) Bad night (1296) Order T-Shirt
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.

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  (515): On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it. http://tfl.nu/mvhu
  Replies (12) Good night (6803) Bad night (1045) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.

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  (678): Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi. http://tfl.nu/4g6k
  Replies (11) Good night (3471) Bad night (1052) Order T-Shirt
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.

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  (321): We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck. http://tfl.nu/5f0o
  Replies (24) Good night (9731) Bad night (1860)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.

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  (612): drunk taco night MLK would want it this way. http://tfl.nu/ye78
  Replies (9) Good night (2598) Bad night (719) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.

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  (301): so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq. http://tfl.nu/u32g
  Replies (7) Good night (820) Bad night (1442) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.

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  (317): Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices. http://tfl.nu/v5r6
  Replies (3) Good night (931) Bad night (388) Order T-Shirt
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  (212): View more from New York

  She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.

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  (212): She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess. http://tfl.nu/ade3
  Replies (9) Good night (1210) Bad night (639) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one

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  (406): I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one http://tfl.nu/6xky
  Replies (3) Good night (758) Bad night (177) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?

  (813): View more from Florida

  Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  Stop reading WebMD high.

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  (813): Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around? (813): Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid? (1-813): Stop reading WebMD high. http://tfl.nu/y2j5
  Replies (6) Good night (957) Bad night (208)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Drunk ass.

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  (715): apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus (651): Drunk ass. http://tfl.nu/f50c
  Replies (3) Good night (434) Bad night (250)

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