:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.