Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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