Quick, to the slutcave!
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
