Screwed.edu
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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