it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
