TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
