Yo dont text me then not text me
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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