garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm gonna have a badass scar
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
