I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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