I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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